| Bohemian Blog Opera: Episode 2 |
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Noisy_Introvert 2/9/2007 9:54 pm
Last Read:
6/17/2008 2:10 pm
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Previously on Bohemian Blog Opera: Bohemian Blog Opera: Episode 1
Episode 2:
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters
It's an ordinary night at the Deuxcomme Inn in the town of Blogburg until mysterious stranger John Riverside bursts in and announces to Sheriff Dr. Thorn Ramsey that he believes he may have killed a man.
THORN: Did you just say you killed a man?
JOHN [looking around desperately]: I – I don't know!
THORN: What do you mean you don't know?
JOHN: Well, it was dark, and I couldn't see...
THORN [grabs John by the shoulders]: What are you saying, man?
JOHN: Well, it may have been... a squirrel.
There is a collective sigh of disappointment from the patrons of the Deuxcomme Inn, who resume their conversations. Over at the informal meeting of the Blogburg Babes Book Brigade, Taylor Tuolomne rolls her eyes.
TAYLOR: I told you he was a waste of time.
SUSANA: But what do we really know about him, girls?
LOUISE: Rumour has it he's dangerous!
The door opens and a father and daughter enter, arguing loudly. It's Chief Black Bear, tall, distinguished, and paradoxical in a cowboy hat, with his beautiful, spirited daughter Sun Mont Eagle, from the local reservation at the outskirts of town.
SUN MONT EAGLE: Daddy, everyone I know is going to the Blogburg Ball!
CHIEF BLACK BEAR: No, Sun. We need you at the casino that night.
SUN MONT EAGLE: Nobody's going to be at the stupid casino on the night of the ball!
CHIEF BLACK BEAR: It is wrong for you to reject your culture for that of the white man.
SUN MONT EAGLE: I hate our culture and everything it stands for! I hate nature! I hate tobacco!
CHIEF BLACK BEAR: This is all because of that pale face who peddles alcohol to our people and steals our daughters while we are weak from the drink, isn't it?
SUN MONT EAGLE [looking longingly towards the bar]: You mean... Pierce St. James?
Back at the bar, Pierce grins and winks at Sun Mont, before turning his attention back to the amnesiac waitress, Jane.
PIERCE: So, you really don't remember anything at all, hunh?
JANE [brightly]: I remembered a name last night!
PIERCE: Oh, yeah? What was it?
JANE [looks down]: I forgot again.
PIERCE [looks away, rolls eyes]
Anne Benedict, owner and proprietor of the Deuxcomme Inn, appears at the top of the stairs.
ANNE: Pierce! I need you! I cawn't make dis book balance. Can you come upstair?
PIERCE [shrugs]: Sure, Mz. Bee
Pierce takes off his apron and jumps over the bar. A collective feminine sigh is felt rather than heard from all corners of the bar. Highland Norfolk III, sitting at the bar, snorts in disgust.
HIGHLAND: I make more money taking a crap than that guy makes in a year.
JANE: He makes pretty good tips.
HIGHLAND: Yeah, well, I give good tips. And it makes me a lot of money.
Over at the BBBB table, the women are observing Highland with some interest.
SUSANA: He's too arrogant for me.
LOUISE: Yeah, but he's rich!
TAYLOR: And cute.
LOUISE: And male, don't forget male.
TAYLOR: I wonder if he has a date for the Blogburg Ball yet.
LOUISE: I saw him first!
TAYLOR: We saw him at the same time!
LOUISE: I am so sick of you sleeping with every man in this town and calling it "research" for your next trashy tell-all book, you skanky little whore!
SUSANA: Louise! Remember what you said about respecting each other!
LOUISE: Forget that! He's mine!
TAYLOR: Shhhhh! He's coming over here!
HIGHLAND: Ladies.
LOUISE [tugs at her boob jacket before thrusting out her hand in front of Taylor's face]: Hi, I'm Louise Guernsey!
HIGHLAND: Hello. I'm Highland Norfück the Third.
Susana's and Taylor's eyes grow wide. They exchange looks.
LOUISE: I'm sorry, did you say... er, the Third?
HIGHLAND: Yes, that's right. Of the New England Norfücks.
Taylor laughs and covers her mouth, feigning a coughing fit. Susana pretends to look under the table while attempting to regain her composure.
LOUISE: Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Mr...
HIGHLAND: Norfück.
LOUISE: Mr. Norfück.
HIGHLAND: Please, call me Highland.
Susana shrieks with laughter under the table.
HIGHLAND: Is your friend alright?
Pierce and Anne re-emerge, descending the stairs together. Anne, beautiful and fragile, holds Pierce's arm to steady herself.
ANNE: Tank you so much, Pierce. You are so very helpful.
PIERCE: It's nothing, Mz. Bee
ANNE: Tell me, can you keep a secret?
PIERCE [shrugs]: Sure.
ANNE [resting her hand on his cheek fondly]: Goodnight, sweet boy.
PIERCE [shrugs]: Night, Mz. Bee.
***
What is Anne hiding? Is it just me or does she talk kind of funny? Will Louise still want Highland when she finds out what a prick he is? Will Jane ever regain her memory? Will she still be dumb as a post if she does? Will Sun Mont Eagle get to go to the Blogburg Ball? What will she wear? And what kind of a flake is John Riverside, anyway?
Bohemian Blog Opera: Episode 3
** For the complete cast of characters, consult These are the blogs of our lives, part une
These things are lame.
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887 posts
2/10/2007 12:20 am
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hey is that sun mont eagle the me me me one. who's Pierce. does he have a lovely pink dong and magnificent blue eyes and stuff. also a big fat juicy brain.
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3104 posts
2/10/2007 12:25 am
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Awwwww, you left me on edge, girl!!! More! More! 
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13066 posts
2/10/2007 4:33 am
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If it wasn't a squirrel, might it have been a walrus?!!!!!
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712 posts
2/10/2007 5:16 am
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Send in...the robots! ::anne might be related to bleh. ::hey, will that squirrel be stewed? like a cane rat? ::5cEntertainment review: an unsycophantic *****/*****
Indie Shows & Appearances
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2/10/2007 5:48 am
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kk, I finally read this. Way kewl post. I signed up. Sorry I am late but maybe you can add me in later. Very good Noisy! Get rippin'!
Besos!
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2/10/2007 8:05 am
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Hey! You actually did it! Funneeeee!
Squirrel! Ha!
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6577 posts
2/10/2007 11:04 am
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franzie, you're just going to have to use your imagination re: Pierce's dong. I'm not going there. Also, at this juncture, he doesn't appear to be too brainy, unlike his alterego, MollyO. At least he's hawt.
Trika, if only I had the mental energy to write one of these things every day like a true soap opera! Oh well. Sit tight, more is on the way.
KC, hm. That's bizarre and unexpectd. I like it. Koo-koo-ga-choo.
sl:: the thing about that squirrel is... the body was never found.
Word, moxie! Thanks for the add-on. Watch for your character in future installments!
u50! I'm so glad you came back! Don't you just love John Riverside? It's fun to watch him get shunned by all the ladies.
These things are lame.
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2776 posts
2/10/2007 11:50 am
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sartre is right. Need more robots.
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6577 posts
2/10/2007 12:25 pm
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Oh, I've got plans for the robots. Just you wait, Henry Higgins.
These things are lame.
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1156 posts
2/10/2007 3:43 pm
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Great work, Noisy.
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2/10/2007 4:34 pm
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Noisy-- Who the hell is Highland Norfook the third? I checked the glossary but couldn't find it.
I really didn't know I had another daughter that is "older" than me, maybe I found her living witha a pack of wolves, and adopted her
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6577 posts
2/10/2007 4:44 pm
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X-man, thanks for the props. I'm loving the Sheriff Dr.
Cowboy, Highland is the creation of sartre_lied, taking liberties with the rules as usual. What are you talking about, a daughter who is older than you? Where are you getting that from? Weirdo.
These things are lame.
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2/10/2007 6:08 pm
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"u50! I'm so glad you came back! Don't you just love John Riverside? It's fun to watch him get shunned by all the ladies."
Hey, as long as he's getting plenty of closeups-maybe one will succumb to his many charms.
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3104 posts
2/10/2007 7:07 pm
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Quoting unknown50:
"u50! I'm so glad you came back! Don't you just love John Riverside? It's fun to watch him get shunned by all the ladies."
Hey, as long as he's getting plenty of closeups-maybe one will succumb to his many charms.
 Could it be Susana Phinney?
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2337 posts
2/11/2007 7:10 am
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I love this, Noisy. Carry on girl and may there be many more episodes. And yeah, let that Louise just find out for herself that the latest guy she is after is a prick. Her alter ego might relate. 
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6577 posts
2/11/2007 9:21 am
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u-five-oh, ever the optimist!
TTKG, hmmmm... (are you sure? Rumour has it he's dangerous!)
karmasweet, well, as long as I remain single, the blog opera will live on. This thing took up most of my Friday night, but it's good to have a break from What Not To Wear.
These things are lame.
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2/11/2007 3:46 pm
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Noisy,
I checked out franzia's profile, and (unless she lied) she is actually older than me. Maybe I've been smoking too much hemp,
but I don't see how this in mathematically possible, unless I adopted her from the wolf pack near Eskimo's cave.
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6577 posts
2/11/2007 5:00 pm
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What? Cowboy, get off the pipe, man. Franzia is 32.
These things are lame.
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3104 posts
2/14/2007 1:32 pm
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TTKG, hmmmm... (are you sure? Rumour has it he's dangerous!)
Ohhh, didn't you know of Susana's great lure for the dangerous, the forbidden, the unattainable?! Hummmmm, it just makes him all the more attractive! No? Mmmmmmm
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4571 posts
2/14/2007 6:55 pm
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Sun Mount Eagle...I imagined feathers...everywhere...Question: Was Chief Black Bear suppossssssssssssed to be Cowboy55?
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499 posts
2/15/2007 11:17 am
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Ok Noisy ... I'm sure you'll find a way to include my newest addition to the list of characters as I may have found a way to tie up some of the truly odd loose ends of some of my castmates ... lol
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6577 posts
2/15/2007 11:53 am
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rg1k, well, none of these characters are supposed to be any of you - I'm working from the bios y'all have written for me. That said, sometimes real life may bleed into certain interpretations... like for instance, head gear.
Hey there IAMT, word! Can't wait to go read the bio! I should have a new episode posted in a couple days or so! Thanks for playing!
These things are lame.
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4571 posts
2/17/2007 12:14 am
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Quoting Noisy_Introvert:
rg1k, well, none of these characters are supposed to be any of you - I'm working from the bios y'all have written for me. That said, sometimes real life may bleed into certain interpretations... like for instance, head gear.
Hey there IAMT, word! Can't wait to go read the bio! I should have a new episode posted in a couple days or so! Thanks for playing!
Yes, this I knew...it's like playing D&D. You have the real life you, and then...you have your player character. See how geeky I be?
But, I ...I was visualizing COWBOY55...shoot, now I have to unvisualize all this so that I won't have cheap, incestrous imaginations of the real life counterparts: Franzie and Cowboy55 puffing feathers... Poor SunEagleMountFranzita.
*putting head in sink, rinsing, scrubbing brain, rinsing...rinsing*
PS: I can't wait to see if Dr. Bolina Windsor sleeps with a horse--or better?
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